This is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier... New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
SISSONVILLE- Betty Gray thought she had seen the last of her prized windchime when neighborhood thugs stole it from her front porch as she helplessly watched from her living room window. She was pleasantly surprised when Sissonville's latest 'super hero', The Silver Beatle knocked on her door ten minutes later to return it.